The Past Was Never Promising.

This blog thing.. haven't made my mind up about it yet. But, it's seems like an okay idea. We'll see. Lately.. I've been thinking a lot about my past. Going through pictures doesn't exactly help. I miss a lot so much. My friends, my grades, how careless I was, the reputation I created for myself..etc. Not that I have lost much, just gained everything a little diferently. I ahve amazing friends, bad grades, and still careless, and reputation is fine, not that anyone knows me very well. But, I have lost all my BEST friends, temporarily lost anyway.. lost my grades, and lost my reputation, because that changed when I left and can't stick up for myself. I started over when I moved to UNA. I had the chance to be anyone I wanted to be... but, I am someone else at home. Here, I'm Alex Smith.. I don't get too serious about anything, I'm loud, I don't believe in much or anyone really, don't put much faith in anything, I don't "fall" for guys, but I don't sleep around.. I'm pretty chill, and two-faced around some, but very blunt at the same time. Jealousy isn't really existant to me, nothing to get jealous about, I stand up for what I believe in (which like I said.. isn't much) I don't open up to anyone, but talk A LOT. But, really... I'm not anything like that, or I didn't used to be. In moulton, I'm Alex Smith, I get hooked quick, but I'll always be hooked on a certain one. I'm still loud, and care a little more about what people think. I believe in God and my friends. I love pretty much everyone, who knows if that's how they feel. My life has changed a lot... I can't exactly decide if it's for better or not. Then, I was always happy, but always sad. Now, I'm always happy...and that's it. Or that's how it seems, I don't know if I can even detect my own feelings. While writing, I'm going to skip the whole.. you get to know me thing, because I don't expect anyone to read this, and I already know myself, but if you do decide to read, you'll get to know me along the way.
Maybe I'll figure this all out. Or maybe this is me just figuring myself out, maybe I didn't know who I was before... I just can't bring myself to believe that, I know that I used to be different, but are you really definite in high school anyway? No. You are still figuring yourself out, and I've only become stronger, maybe. I'm confused about everything, but I still have time.
<3Alexandra.